The short answer is no. It didn’t, not really. Am I glad I’ve done it though? Absolutely! Will I go back to it? I’m still not too sure.
So back to the beginning… I’m a very busy person. I’m also a pretty anxious person, who hasn’t felt too wonderful recently. I’d read a lot about the effect of mobile phones and social media and it also seemed fairly obvious anyway that this was probably adding to my stress and anxiety. So after starting to read the book ‘Digital Minimalism’ by Cal Newport I decided to take break from Facebook, Instagram and many other apps. I deleted a lot from my phone. That’s not to say I haven’t used any apps at all. I kept Pinterest for work purposes and WhatsApp for communicating with friends.
So here’s what I found….. I can confirm that using your mobile phone is highly addictive and actually I don’t think I’m cured completely. I checked my weather app, Pinterest and even Parentmail to replace Facebook and Instagram! I am now a lot better and can leave my phone in the car when I go to the shops and I don’t feel it always has to be with me. This is pretty liberating.
It was really unfortunate that my social media break tied in with me upping my hours at work. I initially had visions of me having loads of time for hobbies but unfortunately this was absolutely not the case. This past month has pretty much been taken up with work, work and more work. If I’m honest I’ve actually felt quite lonely at times but I think it’s been good for me. It’s been good to have time where I’ve had to face my own thoughts, rather than mindlessly scrolling.
One thing it has made me realise is that pretty much everyone spends a ridiculous amount of time with their faces buried in mobile phones. People on the street, on buses, in bars, at the park, having a meal, with their families – all staring at their phones. People are so addicted that they ignore those people they love just for a few more minutes looking at someone far less important on Facebook or Instagram. I truly hope I never, ever go back to making those around me feel as crap as I know it feels to play second fiddle to social media.
It has been nice to do things and not feel like I need to share them with everyone. I’m a chronic over-sharer but now realise that I don’t want to go back to feeling constantly connected via social media. I’ve quite enjoyed the isolation and even when I haven’t, I think it’s been good for me. On the occasions my husband has tried to show me things on Facebook, sat next to me on Facebook or played video clips off Facebook, I can feel my stress levels rising.
Deleting the news app from my phone has also been a really positive thing for me. I worry far too much and so not really knowing what’s going on in the world has actually been a real relief. It’s the same with scare stories on Facebook – I don’t miss them at all. I don’t miss lots of things about Facebook and Instagram.
I had hoped that not seeing gorgeous Instagram fitness models would make me feel better about myself but I don’t. Unfortunately having to work more has meant I’ve had very little time to look after myself or exercise, so I feel pretty shit. I’ve also really missed certain friends on Instagram who really inspire me. But I do feel like I’ve had to dig deep and solve my own problems. I haven’t been able to moan or ask for help, so I’ve just had to crack on.
I don’t quite know where to go from here. I think social media serves a purpose and I probably don’t want to leave it forever. I miss certain people a lot. I don’t miss everyone though I’m afraid. However, I don’t want to prioritise my phone over real people. I don’t want to reach for my phone every time I have a spare second. I don’t want anyone around me to think I’d rather be on my phone than talk to them, I know how crap that makes you feel. I also don’t want to waste precious time that could be spent with my family, running, at the gym, talking to friends and so on. I don’t want to feel constantly connected – I like time where no one knows what I’m doing or how I’m feeling. I also want to set the best example I can for my children.
Social media and mobile phones are without a shadow of a doubt a huge contributing factor to the rise in mental health issues in young (and in my case, not so young) people. Mobile phones are destroying relationships, creating self esteem issues and isolating people without them even realising it. Photoshopped, airbrushed pictures make women (and men) feel insecure and also create unrealistic expectations about what people should look like. If men use Instagram as a measure of what a woman should look like, then how do us real women, with real jobs and children ever hope to measure up?! I have never felt as awful about my own body as I have since joining Instagram.
No, it’s not all bad but I think we have to be so careful about how we use phones and social media. It’s great to be connected to others but most people don’t realise how addicted they are. So many people said to me that they’d love to come off social media but they couldn’t possibly do it. Why not? If you can’t do a month off social media then you have a pretty big addiction.
My next step is to find a way not to disconnect completely but find a healthy balance. I haven’t figured that part out yet but I will. I will because those around me need me to be ok – I need to be there for those I love the most and if my head is in my phone, then I’m not really there.
I’d recommend a month off to everyone. Just to re-set and think about what’s actually important. It doesn’t change your whole life or solve all your problems but it does create a small amount of breathing space. It also makes you see how ridiculous everyone looks glued to their phones. Life is too damned short to prioritise that small screen over those nearest and dearest and over doing things that you love. It really is.
Winging it! 